Praying for God to reveal Himself
I wish I could tell you of all the ways in which I have mastered the art of God revealing Himself to me, but unfortunately I can’t. If I’m really honest – I struggled with sitting down to write this not only because it’s way over the deadline, but also because I guess God has never revealed Himself to me in just one way. Therefore, it’s hard to pick and choose what makes the cut, what gets the stamp of approval and what doesn’t.
So I decided that I’m just going to share a story. I hope that’s okay? And at the end of it, I pray that we can all have a greater understanding of who our God is, and how He manages to reveal Himself to us – in our unique and beautiful ways.
So here goes.
For the longest time I have always wanted the gift of tongues and in 2014, I gave up my full time job because I decided to become an intern for my church and do a program called Discipleship Year. Now, the Discipleship year, was a year dedicated to God and yourself – for us to grow in deeper understanding of both God and self. It was an amazing journey – I did have the most amazing time. Now, we had talks each week and one week the talk was on receiving the gift of tongues.
Luckily for me, I was the only one without the gift of tongues. Woohooo! So what did that mean? It meant, let’s focus on Nikkita and she if she’ll begin to start speaking out in the next 5 hours.
It felt so bizarre to me, and so I wrestled with it. I knew it would be on God’s timing and I also came to peace with knowing – that actually I might never receive the gift. And that is still OKAY.
It doesn’t make me any less of a Christian, and it doesn’t mean that I’ve fallen short. It just means I have giftings elsewhere – but those other giftings are still needed.
So I completed the whole entire program, without ever receiving the gift of tongues.
But, what I did do, is search for God – going on silent retreats, begin to journal more frequently and just continue to fall in love with the God who saved me.
Let’s fast forward to 2017, where I had begun my prayer session – praying for the youth people I work with and naming them individually. And all of a sudden – I started crying, and speaking in a language I couldn’t understand or recognise AND whilst all that was happening – I was still able to think in English and tell myself in my mind to stop speaking like this.
And you want to know the God’s honest truth? It terrified me.
I rung my mentor, and she told me to go and continue being in the presence of God. For me at that moment, it had clicked. God was about to show me more of Himself in a way in which I had never experienced Him before and that’s why it felt scary, that’s why it felt unfamiliar.
And aren’t the biggest adventures, often the scariest? Like a trekker’s dream, to trek the Stairway to Heaven in Hawaii, or a thrill-seeker’s dream to skydive? Those next steps propel us into the people we need to be in order to achieve the destiny that is laid out ahead of us. And our God, wants us to elevate to the next stage He has for us in life.
Now, all this is not to say that you need the gift of tongues, or a miracle of some sort in order for this happen. But what I am saying is maybe He’s already made you aware of Himself and because it is scary ground, new territory – you decide to stay away.
What if God has been revealing Himself to you, all this time?